why self-care isn’t about doing more

WELLBEING

WRITTEN BY EMMA BENYON

MARCH 23, 2025

It’s about doing what matters.

Self-Care – how many times have you heard or seen that you should be taking care of yourself? So much so that it can often add layers of expectation, pressure and stress to something that should be meaningful and intentional.

Self-care has become a buzzword and often the ‘shoulds’ and expectations surrounding this can feel de-motivating, uninspiring and can contribute to the challenges in working out exactly what we need and when.

Self-care gets to be fun, purposeful, meaningful, flexible and intentional, so let’s break down exactly what self care is and isn’t and then we can delve into how can bring these practices into our lives in an intentional way.

In this article:

01 What Self-Care Is and Isn’t

02 Self-Care Practices

03 How to Get Started

04 The Secret to Making it Stick

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Self-care isn’t:

  • Anything that doesn’t bring you joy

  • Anything that must cost money

  • Not about doing more

  • Not about adding in more stress and overwhelm to your life

Self care is:

  • Anything that fill up your energy fuel tank

  • Anything that makes you feel good and brings you joy

  • Anything you can add in to {or remove from} your daily life to nourish and support yourself

  • About setting healthy boundaries

  • About developing a toolkit of practice

Self care practices work best when they are simple and effective practices; practices that support our daily ability to function from a place of ease, support and resource our energy tank so that we can deal with stressful situations easier. These practices are also personal to each person because we are all different, and what we need at different times will be different too.

Each of our days will be different, and there may be points during the year, for example, the Christmas period, where our lives are very busy and we may be more susceptible to burnout and exhaustion. Juggling all of the aspects of our lives can add additional pressures and when we are burnout or exhausted we are unable to give our energy and time meaningfully.

So when we consider self care we need to remember that starting simple, building healthy habits and a healthy relationship with caring for ourselves is key. All the fancy elements can be added in later, if we start simple, we are much more likely to continue the practice and adapt it as we go. It takes approximately 21 days to build a healthy habit, and so starting with something simple and building on that as you, and stacking habits is important.

How to get started

Here are some of the simple self care practices you can bring in to support you:

  • Setting an intention each morning as you start work, perhaps updating your daily to do list to keep you on track

  • Scheduling in regular breaks to get up and move about, ensuring you are drinking enough and always taking a lunch break

  • Curating your environment. A clean and tidy room/desk supports a clear head so having spaces which are inviting and is productive for you will also be helpful

  • Moving your body. Movement is a beautiful way to support our mind and body, perhaps going to the gym, a walk on your lunch break or even a kitchen disco as you brew your cup of tea

  • Planning in rest and time off. In our busy lives it is important to schedule in rest, a holiday, even time off social media to give you the space to be present

Self-care does not mean making massive changes in your daily routine, it is about adding and adapting what you are already doing so that your energy tank is filled, you feel nourished and have the energy to do life well. The key is to try and see which practices work for you, experiment, explore and get creative so that you can add a range of nourishing practices in to your self care toolkit.

Starting to explore how self care can support you, is an incredible way to understand yourself further and how you ‘work’ as a person. These learnings will support you to lead happy, healthy lives, without burnout.

about the author

CONTRIBUTING WRITER

Emma Benyon is a Multi-Certified Coach for Women, Self Care Expert and Educator supporting women who are juggling it all, to reduce the mental overload and be calm, present and intentional. She empowers women through journaling, breath-work and self-care practices to develop their inner coach and reduce their inner critic.

emma

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